Strong Faith, Wavering Dedication

No one likes to admit that their relationship with God is sucky, but I admit it. I could list a million excuses, but none of them are a good enough reason. As a teenager, I was the closest to God I had ever been. I went on a mission trip to Ecuador at 15, and it changed my life. Then I went off to college. I no longer had a church home, and didn’t find one in the small town of two churches. I was too busy with soccer practice to go to the college Christian group that met once a week. That’s when it all started. I went in and out of stronger and weaker times, but I never quite recovered. Recently, I have felt God’s absence in my life more than ever. While I live every day according to my faith, I don’t have a church home, I don’t have an accountability partner, I don’t have a tight group of Christian friends. There is a reason that God asks his followers to attend church. Practicing Christianity on our own is better than not at all, but when we are alone in our faith, we are not immersedin Him. Surrounded by Him. And it’s a problem. There’s no one there to put you in check when you’re giving in to the world. There’s no one there to kick you in the butt when you are laying in bed on Sunday morning thinking about skipping. Finding a church home with people who you can make friendships with is so important for that reason. I have had trouble finding a church home because I often have to go to church by myself (well, just my son and I). Growing up, church was a family experience, often times including extended family. I have trouble now going to church alone, because it makes think of how I experienced church growing up, and then I feel even more alone. My plan is to just church-hop until I find the one that works for my son and me.

How has your faith changed through the years? How have you changed your life to make sure God stays at the center? How did you find your church home?



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